im dead tired :(

i hate it how hc teachers are so efficient. right aft blocks we resume lessons. on top of that, the scripts are ready for collection alr. cant even give us a break lo haiya. :(

to add on to that thu is bio spa skill a. though its our last spa examination for bio, ive been numbed (is there such a word?) by the numerous spas we've had (think at least 6 asssesments per science, 3 sciences) to realise that and be even happy at all. all i noe is ive got work session tmr and i cant reli mug :( die la. gna pia today.. something against my own wishes cos ive hoped to pia onli tmr.

meanwhile, have to go pia council stuff alr. next friday's coming ARGH. anw the elections banners are interesting haha. (think the purple bamner which can change words :O ohno v niao) there are some nice ones too! ahh future juniors..

exam finish, all the work come back again. have i said i liked exams more?? hm.

LALALLAAAAA

blocks are over! i was smiling to myself today aft physics paper 2 ended cos i left like so many blanks and im totally gna fail. :D HAHA.

bt aft tt damn loser la had to stay in sch for work session :( but not like i didnt enjoy it! haha. i cld have joined classmates for lunch if i wasnt punished to clean the council rm at 11 for not bringing my consent form -.- we onli took like half hr and i had so much time to spare i went to prac shooting.

then everyone vacated to go polo cheering :(((((

fireball did our stuff.. and we had more time to spare till 6 which was our trial burn time. i went to play ball again. and i played the guitar and learnt more stuff :D

okay i realise i sound like i didnt enjoy work session. haha.

ELECO CAMP'S NEXT FRIDAY!!!! wth. :(((((

NooOoOoOoOOooooooooo!!!

hello!

its been another 5 days! :D only left with one block test paper on monday. i.e. physics which im gna hav to try to summon enough motivation to mug for starting tmr!

actually i think the block test period has been quite fun. no sianness due to prolonged lessons.. and somehow we all seem to get high before/after a paper :D (resulting in hilarious lunch moments. think touching someone's ass (and the person not responding at all) and tryin to flick chili out of your spoon but missing like 3 times :D among others)

dunno la. somehow this block tests just felt good (not in the results sense). cos i dont feel stressed, ive put in more effort into mugging than last yr.. and alot of things have been happening during this period, good or bad, which has allowed me to learn so much more :)

anw after bio paper today went to yixi's house to play mahjong.. fun :) and played with my bro's psp again (and rediscovered my love for winning eleven) just now. now touching my laptop in case it goes dormant.

i just checked my yahoomail and in 5 days i got 224 spam mail. o.O

shall scoot off to do other random stuff. till when blocks are over! :D

i havent been online in 5 days! :D what a record

ive did as i promised and spent my post jts days mugging. not least in the muggiest environment in school, the school library *holy music*. its really a good envt actually and i got tons done everyday, mugging from ard 10 to 6 when the library closed. then popped down to council rm to breathe the council room air (abt 1.5mths left NOOOOOO), play with the guitar, and i played ball ytd too. :D

but sadly, i rotted in bed till ard 11 today. and my parents were being v distracting cos they were singing karaoke. nevertheless i still managed to get things done :)

oh and i finally finished watching my 40ep hk drama fuyufanyun. :D (that took like 3mths) fung is damn dashing hero-ish la! -drool- and the ending was reli nice. tho the last few eps were kinda.. weird. nvm

im off to play this stupid game i found on chieh's blog! :D haha.

HAPPY :) (no more emo-wei!)

watched huangcheng ytd! quite glad i made a last minute decision to go watch :) and we got the good (as in 3rd row la!) seats! yay :)

it was pretty meaningful (as in the plays) and i think they're better than last yr's cos i cld understand more er, stuff. haha. but the 2nd one was so dramafeste (cue artemis) -.- but other than that, i liked how the first one depicted love in a v simple way and the last one (stnicks chiobu!) was abt materialism vs love. mmm.

met loadsa ppl too! perhaps it gave me motivation (abit no link) cos i sat at my table for 5hrs straight and completed my bio notes. *divine music* gna pia econs later..

there's econs makeup lecture/tut tmr. then there's jts. thats like hotstuff + fun :) mmmm yay!

nvm i shall go slack somemore

DONT WANT
DONT WANT
DONT WANT
DONT WANT
DONT WANT
DONT WANT
DONT WANT
DONT WANT
DONT WANT
DONT WANT
DONT WANT
DONT WANT

dont want to step down :(

we had a really good expose today. :) i felt damn emo la, listening to mrs ang talk, watching our batch's campaign videos (chengxian, old man soonhuat, yenshan the ghost) and singing and dancing! and we all danced speedy to the max today. felt damn shiok.. and probably impressed the nominees (hoho).

and they are the me i was last yr! and yea, u nv reli noe the significance and how much dancing speedy and mass dances and singing means so so so much to us. it was our last public display! :( booooooooooo.

68 days to stepping down. ARGH!

gosh o2 is finally over. after yesterday's slippery slope (during which i slipped and fell 3 times) my whole body ached today and i injured my right arm too. ugh. even joanne (who i met when i was walking in today) could tell that i was tired.

and today was qt a.. saddish day for some of us in the o2 comm. its amazing how our council went thru 6 events and is on our last one. orientation seems like ytd. even earlier events like TD (our first) still remain fresh in my mind. what the heck, i can even rmb my elects camp, internal elections and even campaigning process very very well. there was the mad rush of j1s to register for elections today. kindof reminds me of myself, 1 year ago. gna hand over to the 34th soon.. does it have to be this fast? sigh. these are precious memories that are really priceless. well, at least i love taking pictures cos a picture speaks a thousand words, though never every word.

ohwells. actually that's not the main point.

i saw sth i totally didnt wan to see today and guess what, the emo state of me just returned. so frustrated. it was just like, one more day and i wld have kept to my promise to myself of keepin myself emo-free.

well miraculously, i fell asleep in the bus and when i woke up, it felt as if it was all a (bad) dream. well, i wish.

something just struck me like 3 minutes ago. rice once asked me "do you think 感情是可以培养的?" (wohh chinese haha) i answered her a very firm "yes." almost immediately. but now.. i really wonder. perhaps what i believe can happen to others can never happen to me.

ohyea, was emoing at the bus stop then staring at the sky. i could see 3 colours: blue, yellow, pink. reli pretty. so i just took some random pics, to the curious stare of the pregnant lady beside me (:



i dunno whats wrong with me!

sigh i wasnt emo today i swear. even if i looked emo, it was just cos i was fa lao sao-ing. but i rmbed i forgot to keep my sunblock aft council ended today and guess what, today was council room spring cleaning day. (things get absorbed by the council room floor almost supernaturally you see) so i just got super frustrated agitated irritated whateverwhateverwhatever cos i (thought) i lost my sunblock. and i was searching for that stupid bottle of sunblock and being.. annoying. hai. and soonhuat said i was lei wang wang.

i seriously dunno whats wrong with me.

ARGH. so stupid.

love this song loads (:


for you i will (confidence) by teddy geiger

i'm wandering the streets
in a world underneath it all
nothing seems to be
nothing tastes as sweet as what i can't have
like you and the way that you're twisting your hair round your finger
tonight i'm not afraid to tell you
what i feel about you

i'm gonna muster every ounce of confidence i have
and cannonball into the water
i'm gonna muster every ounce of confidence i have
for you i will... for you i will

forgive me if i st-stutter
from all the clutter in my head
cause i could fall asleep in those eyes
like a water bed
do i seem familiar i crossed you in hallways a thousand times
no more camouflage i want to be exposed
and not be afraid to fall

i'm gonna muster every ounce of confidence i have
and cannonball into the water
i'm gonna muster every ounce of confidence i have
for you i will...
you always want what you can't have
but i've got to try
i'm gonna muster every ounce of confidence i have
for you i will... for you i will... for you i will

if i could dim the lights in the mall
and create a mood, i would
and shout out your name so it echoes in every room
yeah...
that's what i'd do
that's what i'd do
to get through to you



beautiful song.

o2 starts tmr.. have to act enthu again -.- ohwells hope the 2nd intakers have a nice time in hc! (:







AHHHHHHHHHHH

my ipod died today!!!!!!!!!! :((( i have no idea why at all. i totally cant turn it on. and it hasnt even had its first birthday! gna go apple shop someday and complain. booooo. stupid. now i can only stone on the bus/train. haiya. it better nt be permanently sick cos i dowan to spend my money meant for a guitar on a new mp3 player! :(

on a lighter note, i tried the cheesecake i made like 1 or 2 wks ago and it actually tasted nice! :D (apparently i havent had time to eat it and its been in my fridge for a long time) yay. -.-

talenttime today! :D hotstuff rice's group won first for creative category and overall champions! :D so proud of them and they really deserved it so congrats to them! :D

saw these banners this morning during assembly.. couldnt stop staring at them (:








teachers' day, open house, maf, prom, o1, cny. on the other wing was the eleco banner. ahh. all 7 banners up! :((( 6 of 7 events down.. its really amazing how time flies. i dont wanna step down.. this whole term has given me so many memories - happy, sad, irritated, lamed, embarrassed etc etc etc.












the snr committee and our seh caps! :D black orange pink green red blue yellow (and brown).








haiya. emo abit. haha. i was in qt a good mood today actually. lessons were v slack too. (gp tcher din come wahah) but aft lessons ended i got emo again (10th day!) but went for dinner at adam's n dessert at islandcreamery with snr and i felt kinda better aft that :)




















(this, btw is snr doing the genesis gao wei face)


ohyeah the snr mural! haha i love it alot. cos i spend damn long doing the stupid rainbow gradient for the 'snr'. lumn did the stick figures while hongyi n xinyi did the sun. alot of ppl (incl mstan) said it's cute! :D haha. though snr isnt exactly cutesy, but dont care la it's damn nice. hoho. im gna keep it and hang it in my room if the situation permits. (cos its stuck in the middle of a 25m long cloth)























:)

ohyea a's results! alot of my seniors did well.. so i think i gt newfound motivation to go and mug. :D haha. met alot of council and senior class seniors too! :) miss them loads, esp senior class. aww.

hope to get a good slp tnight!
ps: monday off! :D long wkend!

ohmy. time has been non existent for the month of february. cos today's the 1st of march and it certainly doesnt feel like march. and i realised ive been emo since 21st feb i.e. thats ard 9 days.

haha.

ohwells.

i just realised that i think ive been too emo/depressed/unhappy and ive been neglecting my frens and mayb even affecting them. havent talked to lots of ppl for a loong time.

oh and i tink being unhappy has given me breathing difficulties. cos since dinner today i need to take v big breaths. aiya. its almost figuratively 'a burden on my heart'. mm. xin shi.

gna try to snap out of this (maybe it's just pms. maybe).. and smile for myself and the people ard me. and talk to my friends (nt like i havent been talking to ppl but just havent been talking heart to heart with my closest friends lately)

----------------------
the pieces dont fit anymore by james morrison

i've been twisting and turning in a space that's too small
i've been drawing the line and watching it fall
you've been closing me in, closing the space in my heart
watching us fading and watching us fall apart

well I can't explain why it's not enough
coz I gave it all to you
and if you leave me now
oh just leave me now
it's the better thing to do

it's time to surrender
it's been too long pretending
there's no use in trying
when the pieces don't fit anymore
the pieces don't fit anymore

oh, don't misunderstand how I feel
coz I've tried, yes I've tried
still I don't know why
no I don't know why

you pulled me under so I had to give in
such a beautiful mess that's breaking my skin
well I'll hide all the bruises
i'll hide all the damage that's done
but I show how I'm feeling until all the feeling has gone


nice song.